Rain and Frost

January 13th, 2012

Lizzie here! I’ve had the most awful week, thanks to all this nasty weather! First, it gets colder outside. My favorite sun spots in the yard just aren’t warm enough with the wind combing it’s cold fingers through my fur. For some reason, the mistress won’t bring the heaters outside, either. What’s the point in having the heaters inside, when I’m sitting OUTside? Little Bit said maybe it was because it was supposed to rain later, but I don’t see why rain would have anything to do with heaters not being put outside. It’s not like the heaters will do anything to the rain. Little Bit was right about the rain coming later, though. It rained for two days! It was horrible- we cats were stuck in the office together the whole time! Little Bit hogged the blankets and heater by the washer and dryer, which is MY spot. Then Molly kept getting in my way every time I tried to find a different warm spot- I think he was trying to get to my next warm spot before me. I always chased him off though, so HA! Julie and Huey got the floor vent by the door, so I was stuck sharing the heater by the table with Tipsy, who decided to tell me all about how the squirrels were planning to take all our food and take our places as the mistress’ muses. That cat is so paranoid. After it stopped raining it felt so good to be allowed back outside again- the outside world smelled so wonderful! Unfortunately the rain left a few surprises behind. As per usual, I went to jump into one of the lawn chairs to take myself a nice cat nap and soak up some warmth. Instead, I got a fur-ful of cold rain water. Little Bit thought it was hysterical and laughed at me all day. He kept teasing me about it so I decided to treat him to a cold bath of his own. There was a nice, deep mud puddle in the backyard, hidden by some tall grass. I had the perfect revenge plan too- I was going to pretend to hear something behind the tall grass, then tell the others that I heard a mouse and that it was mine, and Little Bit, like always, would run to get it before me, and then SPLASH! Into the mud puddle he goes! It was perfect! Except Little Bit didn’t show any interest in the “mouse” I had claimed! My next plan was flawless though- I would ask Little Bit to come with me to inspect something, and tell him it was a potential danger to the mistress. When we got to the tall grass, I’d say “What was that!?” and while he was distracted, I’d shove him into the puddle! A fail-proof plan- it should’ve gone off without a hitch. Key word: should’ve. Just like my first plan, all was going well at first. When I delivered my line, I even froze and pretended to glance around. Then suddenly I was flying through the tall grass and straight into the mud puddle. Little Bit knew from the start what I was up to, and had tricked me with my own trap! My beautiful fur was covered in nasty mud, and I was freezing from the cold water. The mistress was not happy when she saw me, and I had to have the most terrible thing done- I had to take a bath! There was water everywhere. By the time I was finally clean, the mistress and I were soaked, and I had obtained a nice fear of bathrooms. I tell you, there’s no coming back from something like that. How humans can stand taking baths in all that wet water….ugh! But my horrible experience with water and cold wasn’t over yet. That night the weather got even colder. There was frost everywhere the next morning. The office heat wasn’t working, and the heaters hadn’t been turned on for the day yet, so I was anxious to get outside and find a sunny patch to warm myself. I scooted out the door as soon as it cracked open, and shot down the stairs. Or I attempted to. I skidded and went sailing off the stairs! It scared me so bad. Apparently the water on the stairway had frozen overnight. Everyone thought it was funny, but I certainly didn’t! It was very undignified, and highly embarrassing! I can NOT wait for this evil weather to go away! I need warmth, and dry land. Maybe the mistress will build me a beach in the backyard, with heaters and warm lamps to simulate the sun and it’s warmth! That’s a great idea! I’m going to go tell the mistress now! Bye!

New Year!

January 4th, 2012

Lizzie here! Whew, Christmas was fun! So much paper and ribbons! Even more fun than when we helped the mistress wrap presents! There was paper and ribbon flying every where as the presents were torn open- I, of course, was smack in the middle of it all, batting paper wads out of the air and burying already-opened presents under the shredded wrapping paper. Afterwards, the living room looked like a big cemetary for torn paper and ribbons- it was a blast! We cats stalked each other from under the paper and chased ribbons through the paper….I scared Little Bit really bad when I shot out from under some paper and pounced on his back then ran away- he was so focused on his little ribbon he had no clue I was nearby! Molly dragged paper behind him cuz it stuck to his fluffy tail, which was fun to attack, though I don’t think he liked it when we did. It was really sad when the mistress cleaned it all up though…she took every single scrap of paper and ribbon- she didn’t leave any behind for us cats! Then a few days later she even put up the tree….and the ornaments! I decided to ignore her for a bit after that as punishment for taking all our fun away. Then New Years happened- that was very scary! So many loud noises and odd bright lights! We cats spent most of the night hiding. I don’t know what the fun is in blasting loud sparkly lights out of a cardboard tube….just put glitter in a tube and blow it out! It’s much more quiet, and way more fun! Plus, I can roll in the glitter and make my luxurious fur even more gorgeous! Needless to say, New Years was not as fun as Christmas. At all. I think I’m going to go find some glitter to play with- there has to be some somewhere! Later!

Christmas Decoration Dash

December 20th, 2011

Hey guys! Lizzie here! There are only 5 days left until Christmas and the mistress has been super busy decorating the house and the Christmas tree, as well as wrapping presents. We cats have been pretty busy ourselves though- no idle paws here! We’ve been helping the mistress get ready for Christmas. Little Bit brought the mistress a mouse he caught to put on the tree, but for some reason the mistress refused to put it on the tree, so Little Bit pouted under the tree for a while. He had to move once the mistress started putting presents under there. He grumbled at first, but the mistress gave him a wad of wrapping paper to play with so he was okay after that. Molly got in trouble not too long after, and almost got me in trouble too. The ornaments on the tree are so shiny and tempting we just had to go after them! We would’ve continued to bat at them if Molly hadn’t knocked a few off and made them shatter- the mistress was furious! Thankfully she didn’t see me playing with them on the other side of the tree, so only Molly got in trouble. Tipsy tries to climb the tree a lot, but the mistress always catches her before she gets too far. Tipsy complains that she’s compromising the safety of Christmas by denying her the tree as a guard command center. I hope she doesn’t chase Santa away- I want my presents! Julie is no fun right now. She just gets in the way because she can’t see very well and ends up right where she shouldn’t be. Julie got too close to Little Bit while he was playing with some wrapping paper once, and she almost got bit except Huey made Little Bit back off. It was almost a disaster, but the mistress put Julie in a chair by the fire after that. Huey got in the chair with her and they fell asleep together. They’re still sleeping now. Dippity and I have been helping with the present wrapping. The bows are so much fun! The paper isn’t as much fun as the bows and ribbons, but it’s still pretty fun- me and Dippity love the way it crinkles and rattles when we walk on it, and it’s so much fun to attack it when it moves! We would jump on it and play with it, then the mistress would make a funny noise and chase us away and then we’d start again- we love playing that game! I think the mistress got tired of it though, because she gave us both wads of wrapping paper and a couple of bows and ribbons to play with and took her wrapping stuff and the presents to the back room and shut the door. Dippity mangled his bows and ribbons right off the bat without playing with them- what a waste! The best way to play with the bows is to pounce them like a mouse, throw them in the air, bat at them, and chase them! The wrapping paper wads are good for that too, but I find the bows are easier to grab with my teeth since they aren’t as big as the wrapping paper wads. I played with my wad of wrapping paper for a bit, but it ended up in the tree. After what happened with Tipsy, and what happend with Molly and the ornaments, I wasn’t going to risk going after it. Besides, I had the best toys to play with still- my bows! I stalked them from across the room, and ran and pounced them! I flung them in the air and caught them, then rolled on my back and gave them a thorough attacking with my teeth and back claws. After a while I noticed there was something annoying in my fur on the back of my neck. It made me crouch down and squirm because it felt so uncomfortable. Whatever it was, it wasn’t supposed to be on the back of my neck! I rolled around and tried to get it off, but it wouldn’t come off. Then a new uncomfortable, annoying thing was stuck on my tail and my head! I whipped around and discovered one of my bows stuck to my tail- I chomped on it and pulled it off, losing a nice bit of fur along with it. That made me mad. I started trying to scrub the others off, but when I felt them pulling my fur out I stopped. I decided it was time to get the mistress to help, and stalked off to go find her. Just as I was about to start up a string of pitiful “help me” meows, I caught sight of something moving at the end of the hallway. I froze and stared at it. It was a cat! I crept closer, raising my fur and growling low, warning it to leave, but it kept coming closer and closer. As I watched, I noticed something odd about the cat- there was something on it’s head and neck. That’s when I remembered the big mirror the mistress put at the end of the hallway- I was staring at me! I looked closer, and studied my reflection. My beautiful green eyes stared back at me as I inspected myself- my glorious, soft fur was illuminated by the light from above, and looked pretty darn fantastic if I do say so myself! Then I peered at the bows. They were shiny and purple, and went well with my orange tabby splotches. I decided I looked very stunning, not that I ever don’t look stunning, with these new additions. I strutted around in front of the mirror, enjoying my new accessories, when the mistress came out of the back room and saw me. I ran up to her and purred, rubbing against her legs and showing off my fabulous bows. Then the mistress did something absolutely appalling- she took my bows off! She pulled them right off, along with some of my fur, and said “Poor Lizzie I bet those bows really bothered you. They’re all gone now so you’ll be okay.” I was certainly NOT okay! My wonderous bows, taken from me! But she wasn’t done there- she rounded up all the other bows and put them away! I’m still mad even now! I can’t get to the bows anymore, so now I’m stuck with just my plain dazzling self, with no glamorous bows to accentuate my stunning fur! Wait, what’s that? There’s something shiny in the corner…..SHE MISSED ONE! I MUST HAVE IT! Bye guys, I have a bow to claim! Merry Christmas!

Christmas Countdown!

December 14th, 2011

Lizzie here! Christmas is getting closer and we cats are so excited! Christmas means family, food, and of course, the decorations! All those bows and ribbons….all the wrapping paper! And can’t forget the TREE! “Oh Christmas tree, oh Christmas tree, how lovely are your ornaments…I cannot waiiit to climb in you, play with the lights and de-ornament you….oh Christmas tree, oh Christmas tree, we’ll have our play date very soon….” You guys like that? Can you believe it just came to me? I should write Christmas songs for cats. Maybe the mistress will help me…Molly says he likes it- I think I’ll let him be one of my singers just for that. If anyone throws boots at us, I’m setting Little Bit loose on them! Oh I can’t wait to get into all the decorations and wrapping paper! I’m off to watch the mistress hang up said decorations so I can choose which I want to go after first! Bye!

Turkey Heaven- For Us.

November 29th, 2011

Lizzie here! Hope you guys had a great Thanksgiving! We cats sure did! Unfortunately, I didn’t see anymore turkey in our backyard. I think the other turkey must have warned the other turkeys to stay away…the mistress still had her turkey though, so I wasn’t disappointed. Much. While we didn’t get any feathers, we did get our share of turkey. Little Bit inhaled his, and almost choked. That old bat should know better than to try to scarf it all down that fast at his age. Later, the mistress cleaned up and took the remains of the turkey outside, but it rained so she didn’t make it to the garbage can. I took advantage of this and helped myself to the leftover turkey. I don’t know why humans throw out the bones- they are delicious! The other cats soon discovered the leftover turkey like I had, and the lot of us picked the bones clean, and turned them into playthings. Batting my bone around was so much fun! I accidentally batted it into Tipsy once, and she jumped a foot in the air and ran off. She left her bone behind, so I snagged it too. Little Bit came around and checked everyone’s turkey bones, looking for the wishbone, but none of us had it. I told him the mistress probably took it, or one of her family. He stopped looking after that, but sat by himself grumbling. The mistress wasn’t too happy to see the mess we made, so she picked up all the bones and put them back in the garbage bag. They didn’t stay there for long though- I wasn’t going to give up my turkey bones, and neither was anyone else! Eventually the mistress cleaned them away again, and finally took the bag to the garbage can. We were all sad that we’d lost our playtoys, but I had a secret. I had hidden one of my bones behind a bush around the back of the house where no one could find it, so I still have one of my turkey bones to play with! Speaking of which, I’m going to go have fun with it now! Later!

Turkey Bird

November 17th, 2011

It’s me, Lizzie! The mistress got the turkey before I could get it and she put it in the big cold box. I didn’t even get to play with the feathers….maybe I’ll at least get to eat some turkey when Thanksgiving gets here. Molly learned the hard way that you gotta be very careful and super sneaky to get yourself a turkey. Never try to take it head on. I saw another turkey today out in the backyard and went into stalk mode. It was a huge bird, and I knew I would have fun with all those feathers. Unfortunately Molly saw me and looked around to see what I was after. He saw the mammoth turkey and decided he wanted it for himself, and promptly charged straight at it. Right when he got up to it, the turkey spun to face him and charged right back at Molly, who had skidded to a stop when the turkey turned around. Molly took off in the other direction with the turkey hot on his heels. I didn’t think Molly could get any more poofy, but that turkey scared him so bad he was almost 3 times his normal size. Little Bit finally took pity on Molly, and went and got the mistress. The mistress brought out a broom and chased the turkey off, while Little Bit hissed at it. Molly eventually walked around towards me and I couldn’t resist saying, “Every cat knows you don’t just waltz right up to a turkey. Didn’t you know any better?” I think it hurt Molly’s feelings, but it serves him right for taking my turkey. I would’ve gotten it, but thanks to him we lost it! Little Bit told me I shouldn’t be so mean- he wouldn’t say that if it had been HIS turkey Molly lost! Maybe my turkey will come back and I can go after it again. I hope so- all those feathers would keep me busy for a week! Well I’m going to go plan my new attack on the turkey, cuz you can never have the same plan twice when hunting turkey!

Turkey Day!

November 15th, 2011

Lizzie checking in! Thanksgiving is next week and we cats are super excited! The mistress usually has a big spread planned- all that yummy food! I really hope she gives us some turkey, and maybe some of the other dishes she’ll have…..I’m only concerned about that turkey though. That big tasty bird, seasoned and cooked to purrrrrrfection….oh I hope she gives us some! Hmm….where does the mistress get the turkey? I wonder if it’s hidden out back….I’m going to go check! Before I go turkey hunting, what all do you guys have planned for Thanksgiving? Have a good week! HERE I COME TURKEY!!

New Book!

November 7th, 2011

Lizzie here! The mistress has a new book, “Mirror Mirror”! That Dippity kept this secret from all of us, and the mistress too. So unfair- it’s not nice to keep secrets! It sounds like a really good book, though, so I’m excited to read it. Here is the cover and description for the mistress’s new book, “Mirror Mirror”! Enjoy!

A rare psychic who sees and talks to dead people through mirrors and other reflective surfaces must convince a stubborn detective with abilities of his own to believe her so they can stop a serial killer preying on innocent little girls.  Will the intense physical attraction they can’t ignore help to unite them, or will Spider let his past ill fated relationship with a dubious psychic who used him color his view of Jade and what she has to offer?

Mirror Mirror, is a stand-alone book.  It’s the story of how two unique people with very different psychic abilities must learn to trust again, putting aside their pasts to find a dangerous killer from taking his next victim.

mirror-mirror.jpg

Rainy Day Blues

November 3rd, 2011

Lizzie again! It’s been a horrible rainy day- all this wet has kept us cats inside all day and we’re so bored! I wish the rain would stay away cuz I don’t really like getting wet. The cold isn’t much better either. I’m so glad the office is warm! The mistress is out eating, so I’m making good use of her computer while she’s gone- I can’t find anything about any new books though. Little Bit says I should quit snooping and get off the mistress’s computer. He just wants to get on himself! The mistress won’t be happy to know that Tipsy is messing up the blinds- I’m gonna go get her to stop! Later!

Happy Halloween!

October 31st, 2011

Lizzie here- Happy Halloween everybody! Tonight is the night for tricks and treats, and here at our house there have been plenty of both!It has been very exciting for us cats- just listen to this! A group of trick-or-treaters came by, anticipating the wonderful candy the mistress had. What they didn’t know was that Little Bit was loose, and on the prowl. As soon as he scented their bags filled with yummy treats, Little Bit began stalking towards them. When he got 10 feet away, he rushed the lot of them, sending them all scattering, no one quite sure what sort of demon had attacked their group. All that could be seen in the dim porch light was a black blur, jumping on individuals and frantically searching every nook and cranny on their person and then zealously searching their forgotten treat bags, abandoned at the beginning of this mad venture. Soon all the trick-or-treaters had been raided by the black demon and were thoroughly shaken. The mistress apologized and divided the remaining candy between the trick-or-treaters as compensation for their rough scare. After they left, and the mistress was scolding Little Bit for his unruly behavior, I creeped around the porch area, searching for any forgotten treats. As luck would have it, I found two pieces of candy corn, resting under a bush beside the porch. I took these to the big oak tree and settled down in it’s dark shadows to enjoy my plunder. As I chewed each morsel, enjoying the sweet flavor, my attention was drawn to a funny noise on the porch. I looked up and saw the mistress just past the porch, still fussing at Little Bit, and on the porch was her pumpkin-shaped candy bucket. As I watched, the bucket shook slightly, then stilled. My curiousity aroused, I stalked closer to the bucket. Again it moved, then became still. In the background, I became aware that Little Bit and the mistress had gone silent and were watching my progress. With this knowledge I became more determined to find out what threat lay within the pumpkin. I slowly crept up the porch stairs, and inched my way toward the bucket, pausing every so often to watch, making sure my prey was still ignorant to my presence. As I neared it, I recognized something about the way the bucket smelled, but pushed that thought out of my mind as I prepared to attack. Cautiously I snuck right up to the pumpkin, then, with only a moments hesitation, struck inside the pumpkin with my paw, claws extended. A surprised yowl came from inside, shocking me and my audience. I sprang back, fur and back raised, hissing my challenge to the cat inside. The pumpkin rattled a bit more, then out from the top popped Molly’s ginger head, just as surprised as everyone else. As we watched, dumbfounded, Molly attempted to exit the candy bucket, but his broad shoulders stuck on the rim. In his struggle to free himself, the pumpkin tipped over and began to roll around the porch, Molly stuck inside. It made quite a spectacle, since Molly’s head was still poking out from the top as the pumpkin rolled in a circle a few times before slowing to a rocking stop. The mistress sank to the ground, laughing, as Little Bit simply sighed and stalked off, mumbling about “foolish young cats getting themselves stuck in places they ought not get stuck”. After getting over my initial surprise, I rolled onto my side and meowed with laughter. Trust Molly to be the one to get too curious and get himself stuck! I continued to laugh my tail off as the mistress finally stopped laughing long enough to help free Molly from the candy-scented pumpkin. I don’t think we’ll be forgetting this Halloween any time soon! Haha! As a Halloween gift to us cats, the mistress later gave us some tasty cat treats (I saw her give Molly an extra since he “had such a traumatizing experience with the pumpkin bucket”- unfair since I risked my life to defend her when the pumpkin had posed a threat! Where’s MY extra treat?!). Hope all of you have a Happy Halloween!

Lizzie